What Do Camping and Halloween Have in Common?

What Do Camping and Halloween Have in Common?

Scary stories of course!

All children, just like adults, like to feel scared a little bit, from time to time. Why would people watch horror movies otherwise? Halloween, with all its bloody ghouls and monsters, remains a favourite holiday for many children. Some psychologists say that scary stories prepare children for the scary world out there, without putting them in any danger.  So being scared is just a part of life, as we simply cannot protect our children from all the bad things that could happen (but most likely won’t). So although our instinct is to shield and protect at all times, raising children in the artificial bubble is not doing them any favour. And scary stories have had their place in rising children for generations.

But what can we do when scary stories and costumes make for sleepless nights, nightmares or bedwetting in younger children?

First of all it is important to validate and not to dismiss the fears, as it might lead the child to feel ashamed and stop talking about it.

Next step would be to discuss the issue in the light of day. For example explaining how the monsters in movies are not real, but just “special effects”, and ghosts in the book are just a fantasy. During the day these explanations seem so much more logical.

Reading a good book on the subject of monsters hiding in the closet or under the bed might do the trick as well. I remember that it worked very well with my son when he was about 3. We had to read that book again and again with plenty of reassurance from me that all that monsters are just invented for the plain fun. If that doesn’t work, then eliminate scary stories and movies till the child gets older.

There are also some other strategies for relaxing before bed like writing down scary thoughts and keeping them locked in a box, deep breathing exercises (like in yoga), shrugging your shoulders up to your ears and then relaxing them with a deep ahhh...., visualizing or remembering a happy vacation time.

Having a good coping strategy in case of a nightmare is also helpful. This should be something simple, like thinking of what mommy or daddy would say or hugging the bear and singing him a lullaby.

So enjoy all the scary stories by the campfire and at  Halloween.